12 questions to ask grandparents and keep their family stories
Bring one old photo and choose two or three questions. You do not need to record a whole life in one afternoon. These prompts work with grandparents, parents, older relatives or someone who has become family to you. Let them choose what they want to share.
Start with an ordinary day
Small details give a conversation somewhere to begin. Rather than asking for a complete childhood history, picture one room, meal or journey together. If an answer is short, give it space before moving to another question.
- If we could walk into your childhood kitchen at dinner time, what would we see and hear?
- Which everyday journey from when you were young could you still describe turn by turn?
- What did you and your friends make up to do when there was nothing planned?
Let a photo lead the conversation
Choose a photo they are comfortable discussing. Write down names as they say them, including nicknames or the spelling they prefer. Mark uncertain dates as approximate. A remembered detail is worth keeping without turning a guess into a fact.
- What was happening just before or just after this photo that we cannot see?
- Which person in this picture would you like me to know more about?
- Is there a place in our old photos that looked very different by the time I knew it?
Find the little things your family passed along
A recipe, a saying or a way of welcoming visitors can open up a story. Families change, and not every tradition needs to continue. Ask with curiosity rather than trying to decide which version is the right one.
- What is a family saying that would need explaining to someone meeting us for the first time?
- Which dish do you make by memory, and who would recognize the way you make it?
- What small thing did someone do that made arriving at their home feel special?
Leave something to look forward to
The conversation does not have to stay in the past. Finish with something you could do together now, on a visit or a call. A good next step can be as small as finding another photograph.
- Is there something you used to enjoy that you would like to show me how to do?
- Which family story would you like us to ask about the next time we talk?
- What ordinary thing from your week would you like me to know more about?
Make it a conversation, not a questionnaire
Ask whether now is a good time and whether there are topics they would rather skip. Offer a short conversation and let them decide when to stop. Listen without correcting every detail. You can return to uncertain names or dates later, or leave them marked as unknown.
If you want to make an audio or video recording, ask first. Agree who may hear it and where it will be kept. Choosing not to record is fine; a few notes can be enough. On a call, leave room for pauses and check that both people can hear comfortably.
Keep one story with the people in it
Afterward, read back a short note: who told the story, the date you talked, the people mentioned and one detail you want to remember. Ask whether they would change anything and whether you may share it with specific relatives. Keep a personal copy of anything important.
Add the names you learned to the free family tree template, or put the photo and note in the free family memory journal. Both work without a Kinello account. The worksheet files stay separate from the app and cannot be imported into it.
If your family uses Kinello, you can save the agreed photo and written story in Story, choose its audience and group related memories in a collection. Invite one relative who would enjoy adding their perspective. Sharing is optional; the conversation is worthwhile on its own.
Further reading
The questions above are original Kinello prompts. For more interviewing guidance:
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